Analysts Say Males Moved Approximately 99% Closer To Screens For The Stellar Blade Trailer During The Recent State Of Play

Playstation recently had its State of Play and howdie doodie did they deliver. Or at least that’s what analysts claim that studied the reactions of 50 male volunteer test subjects during the showcase. The Death Stranding 2 trailer had the men sitting back very distinguished, nodding their heads, hands on their laps with a look to show they had no idea what the heck was going on. During Silent Hill 2 the men put on their brave face and adult nappies were provided for those who admitted they may have an accident while viewing the horrifying content. The new Sonic game was an excuse for 49 of the men to get up and use the toilet while the one remaining man was running around the room saying “it’s gotta go fast time!” The last game that brought any kind of significant change to the behaviour of the men was the Stellar Blade trailer. Seats were shuffled in closer to the screens and the men sat on the edge of them. We tried calling out to the men in this state that they were in except we were ignored and waved away. Drool dripped from their lips and their eyes were unblinking. Whenever the main character Eve left the screen the men would look around distressed asking where she went and whether she was coming back. This new enthusiasm by the men left analysts confused, the volunteers were more than happy to stay back and rewatch the trailer for any other required research purposes though.