Russian Attack Foiled By Cache of Super Mario RPG
- Nick
- Nov 9, 2023
- 1 min read
Ever opened a crate of RPG's for use against your enemy only to find the game SMRPG inside? This week a Russian attack was made feeble and useless as Ukraine made use of its Defence Minister For Pranks.
Zelensky and his men were imbound with a tank assault and Putin ordered his men to open the crate marked 'MINES.' The crate was opened and a Russian soldier scratched his head and remarked with confusion, "Vut is dis?" Before him laid a crate full of sealed copies of Minecraft. This crate would be useless in their efforts against the tank assault. Putin, wrapped in bear skin stared coldly at the games and ordered the next crate to be opened, labelled 'RPG,' the most super effective weapon used against tanks. Again the soldier stood confused above the opened crate as he pulled out a shiny copy of Super Mario RPG. Enraged, Putin tore the bear skin to shreds and frothing at the mouth roared!
"Get me my gun!"
Zelensky now stood next to his tank outside the Kremlin and waited for Putin to make his move. A briefcase was brought to Putin with the word 'GUN' written on the side.
"I'm sick of your pranks Zelensky, now die!" He opened it to find a copy of the game set in the wild west, Gun. Embarrassed, Putin threw the game at Zelensky and Zelensky dodged it, he then said to Putin.
"I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries." The Ukrainians all flashed a moonie to Putin and won the day!
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